Everything's coming up Rosie

November 6, 2007. What a great day. O.K., I admit, I love Rosie O'Donnell. Say what you will about her, but she stands up for what she believes, and gives a strong voice to millions of people who don't share her access to the media. U.S. media- what a joke. Instead of demanding a full explanation to all of the suspicious events of 9/11 in outrage, they force feed us fluff pieces about Britney Spears not wearing panties, or Paris Hilton crying because she has to go to jail. Instead of discussing why World Trade 7 is the only building in history to have collapsed in free fall from fire, they give free advertising to histrionic celebrities. Why aren't more people outraged? Because they're not allowed to be. The media tells us what's important. Watch BBC news if you want real news. Watch U.S. news if you want propaganda and B.S.. But then again, BBC news reported WTC 7 collapsed 20 minutes before it actually did, with the building in plain sight right behind the reporter, so whom CAN we trust? I trust Rosie.

I digress. Let's go back to November 6th. I woke up early because I wanted to go meet Rosie at Borders Bookstore in Columbus Circle. I did my yoga, and off I went. I noticed the Christmas lights had been strung up on the light poles in preparation for their Thanksgiving awakening. Rosie's voice popped into my mind saying "Christmas is coming early for you this year." In Columbus Circle, amidst the chilly mist of the fountains, an older black woman was walking towards me with a stroller; "A nanny", I thought. These two invaders of my mind would prove to be a foreshadowing of things to come.

The first thing I saw when I entered the Time Warner building, where Borders is located, was a gargantuan statue of a smiling obese oriental man with a small penis. He was standing tall and proud despite his shortcomings. I thought to myself, "How apropos?". Rosie knows her shortcomings, but she refuses to be bullied into silence, because she knows something's not right with the world. Disharmony abounds.

I bought my copy of "Celebrity Detox" and stood on the line that stretched and wound from one end of the large store to the other. I figured I would have time to start reading it. There was a woman behind me who brought to mind my friend Chris and his blog, where he rants about annoying people. She decided she was going to use her cell phone to get attention, regardless of whether or not the attention was positive. One call after the other, she spewed the banality of her life into my ears, stopping short of tapping me on the shoulder to say she wanted to talk to someone. I tried my best to keep reading. I reached the end of the line almost a quarter of the way through the book.

The moment had arrived. The moment where I meet the woman who starred in "A League of Their Own" with Madonna. The woman who married the woman she loved, partly in protest to the Bush administration. The woman who brought her unique, uncensored view to "the View". I was overcome with emotions- so many emotions; so much to say; so many people waiting behind me. I managed to thank her for all she did on "the View". She gave me a hug and I gave her a kiss.

November 6th was Rosie day for me. A few days prior, I noticed on her blog that she was performing at Lincoln Center for the New York Comedy Festival after the book signing. I had to go. I purchased a ticket on the Internet, but I wasn't very happy with my seat. After the book signing I went to pick up my ticket from the box office. I asked the teller if I could possibly get a better seat. She said, "I can give you third row center". "Third row, as in A, B, C, third row?", I asked. I had to be clear on this because the ticket I had purchased was in row HH, meaning it was passed rows A-Z and all the way from AA to HH in the orchestra section. "That's beautiful", I said, "thank you so much.".

I went home for the few hours between the book signing and the show. I ate a little, waited two hours, and did some more yoga. I showered, put on fresh clothes and made my way to the city for a night of theater. As I sat in my seat, which was spitting distance from the stage, I looked around to see when the auditorium would fill and people would take their seats so that the show would start. There was a very pretty, youthful woman staring at me and smiling for some reason. It didn't click, but later on, sitting at home, looking at pictures from the show on Rosie's website, I came to realize that the woman was Fran Drescher. Yes, it was "the Nanny" herself.

Rosie strutted onstage to the sounds of Eminem, and nonstop laughter followed. I was the victim of a frozen smile. Rosie was in top form. In a word, hysterical. The early Christmas present was Roseanne Barr. Rosie introduced her to thunderous applause and a standing ovation. During their respective sets, both Rosies looked at me a few times, and I felt as if they were speaking only to me. After a full set from each of the Rosies, they took the stage together as a comedy tag-team. The literal showstopper was Rosie and Roseanne singing "I've Got You Bitch". Rosie took the Cher parts, and Roseanne took the Sonny parts. Pure Magic. Merry Early Christmas to me!